Friday, January 27, 2012

The Loss of a Child

What a horrible title for a post.  Unfortunately, as a pediatric hospitalist and through my journey with Altynai, the loss of a child is something that I have far too much experience with.   Losing a child is never, ever an easy thing to wrap your head around. Tonight there are now thirteen Kyrygz families that are in despair because they have "lost" the child that they were so close to bringing home and that loss is a real one.  They have lost a loved one.  A child that they fell deeply in love with many years ago.  A child that they have fought dearly for.  A child that they had hopes and dreams for.   And to make matters worse, very few people they are close to will totally understand the gravity of this loss.  To be honest, I think that is only people that are within the adoption community, that can fully understand the gravity of the pain that these parents are facing.  I know that I learned that the hard way during the midst of our challenges with Altynai.  To outsiders, they think we are crazy and probably more than a little dramatic, but that is far from the truth.  It is because of the bond that forms between the prospective adoptive parents and the child they have been matched with that makes us so unique.  We have the ability to fall head over heals in love with a child that is not of our blood, and for that matter, often, not even of our own race or color.  We are drawn to adoption by a God that lead us there.  He opens our hearts and allows us to love these children like they are our own, even if we have spent little to no time with them, so when a referral is loss, it can be devastating. And the timing of this week's heart wrenching news could not have been more cruel and I am completely heartbroken for these families, including the, now five that were recipients of Altynai's Fund.  I just hope and pray that God has something wonderful in store for them and that these precious little ones are thriving in their new homes. 

In tribute to a mother's love....  Love you Lisa and Nargiza!

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